Am I the only one who gets triggered by the holidays? 

I find myself acting from a far less secure, far less evolved, far more fearful place. At these banner moments, with so much pressure to present my best, feel my best, and do my best, I struggle to embrace the spirit of the festivities.

If you’re anything like me, all holidays have the potential to bring excitement, nostalgia, and the worst version of myself. Along with gratitude and a desire for coziness comes a lot of pressure and stress. Finding just the right gift, making picture perfect memories, creating hygge whenever possible, and keeping up with the endless expectations can make the holidays anything but peaceful and harmonious. 

I often obsess over insignificant details and pick fights. I transform from the 33-year-old I love and love being to varying versions of a younger, less savory Bailey.

I might wake up as a tightly-wound law student, a teen wanting so badly to measure up, or a child outsider. From now on, I choose to accept this with patient curiosity. Instead of resisting, I choose to lean into the dissonance. I choose to learn what I can from the young Bailey who manifests and make sure she knows that I love her, I forgive her, I understand her struggle, and I’m so thankful she did her best.  

Even as I wrote this article this year, I found myself running all over town obsessing over insignificant details of my outfits and the right dessert to bring to each gathering, all while missing the chance to savor the magic of this time of year and enjoy time with my husband.

I believe the stress placed on these details is rooted in a belief that I’m not good enough, that if I fail to present a picture perfect exterior, everyone will see past my facade and find out what I know to be true.

Perhaps the solution isn’t simplifying my obligations, setting spending limits, or shopping local. Perhaps the solution is digging out the belief that I’m not good enough and replacing it with a firm conviction that I am valuable regardless of how any one day or one picture or one impression turns out.

IN CONCLUSION

I’d love to continue the conversation about taking the CRAZY out and infusing more peace into the holidays through intentionality! Find me on Instagram @bailey_bowerman if you have any questions about my recommendations or have any further insight!

xoxo Your Favorite Late Bloomer